to you who are hurting

it can be very troubling to exist within this paradox

this perpetual shift of one Body's joy and pain

I know that if it wasn't paradox, as it is for some,

it would be unbearable

but I'm greedy

I want joy for more

time

space

more of us

not just the privileged few, myself included,

who can afford momentary distance from what ails us

I want the joy I cling to

to reach more of me

to reach all of you

who don't have this luxury

maybe that's this incongruous moment

the forgiving and glorious peace of a calm lake at sunrise

and the shadow and weight of multitudes of suffering and fear

past present and future

your anger

your suffering

your fear

please take my joy

I have plenty in this moment

and I'd like to balance the pain

as I kneel here

long enough for this small spider to include me in its web

long enough for my legs and feet to tingle

long enough for the sun to rise above the treetops

long enough for these insects to leave countless rings in the water's surface

long enough for the swans to reach my view

long enough for this peach and blue, these ripples and leaves, these small movements creating waves

to heal some small part of me

and I say

I'm sorry I can't take your suffering from you and give you ease.

I'm sorry you're afraid. I am too.

I love you.

Please take my joy.

It won't disappear.

It will only e x p a n d